I have a few friends who are married to men who are gone nearly all the time. They have children together and that's about all that they have in common anymore. It's so sad. It takes a toll on the children. They feel a tension between the "world" and the "church". The world tells them to file for divorce. The church tells them to tough it out, be the gentle guidance that their husband needs. A few of my friends don't feel freedom to discuss this problem. This topic, within many Christian circles, is taboo.
Carla Anne Coroy tackled the issue in her book "Married Mom, Solo Parent". I am impressed with her openness in this book. She discusses with honesty her emotions, her thoughts, her struggles. For a mother (or even a father) going through this struggle, this would be an invaluable resource of encouragement and edification.
With chapters that lean to the practical side (ie, keeping the house clean, keeping mealtime a great experience for the kids, attending events and special occasions alone), Carla is lending a hand, teaching her coping skills. She is saying, in these chapters, that it is possible to physically survive this time of life.
Carla also writes about the emotions, the grief, of being in this Married Mom, Solo Parent position. She writes about honoring the husband who is absent, the need for a break, the price that the kids pay in this situation. I can't imagine that these were easy chapters for her to write. However, they are sure to help another woman to know that she isn't alone in these painful emotions.
The very last chapter of this book was written by her husband. Now, let's just say, that takes some humility. I found his ideas for talking to an absent husband to be very enlightening. And, in writing that chapter, he truly showed his willingness to be the supportive, present father he needs to be.
This book would be fantastic for a woman who is living in this kind of marriage, for family ministries at a church, for counseling situations, for friends hoping to understand the struggles of a friend.
I highly recommend this book.
Please note: I received a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
Wow! What a fabulous review of my book! Thanks for giving a good review of all the parts of it. I did try to make it not only practical but also to let women (like me) know we're not alone. There are more of us out there... and we can do the job well with God's help!!
ReplyDeleteBlessings!
Carla Anne